Compadres,
For the last week, it’s almost felt a bit like sports have been back. And it’s just been darn delightful.
Let’s dive in. Let’s play ball. Let’s go.
But before we tip off, how about you share the Digesta with a pal and make your humble keyboard warrior’s day?
Are Sports Back?
No, but for one night it sure felt like they were.
I’ve never been the biggest follower of the NFL Draft. My NFL fandom consists of following the sport while it’s in season, largely due to my fantasy football competitiveness and because I like to gamble trifling sums of money on games (it’s a dumb habit of mine, I’m sorry). After the Super Bowl, I mainly tune the NFL out and move on to other sports.
But boy, was it good to have a live sporting event to watch, react to, follow online, and talk to friends about. It seems like my feeling was replicated nationwide, as the draft scored record ratings in its first foray into the virtual format.
Last Thursday night, the NFL Draft was IT. It was THE event for sports fans to talk about, and what a relief it was to have.
Oh, and the event brought no shortage of memorable and hilarious moments either. Here’s a breakdown of some of my favorite moments from the 2020 NFL Draft.
1) CeeDee Lamb, showing he has the best hands in the draft class
CeeDee Lamb, viewed by many as the most talented receiver in the 2020 draft, somewhat surprisingly fell to the Dallas Cowboys with the 17th pick. After seeing this clip, Dallas has to be more assured that they got their guy. With ESPN’s cameras tuned in to Lamb’s house, his girlfriend tried to catch him sleeping and peep his phone. Lamb wasn’t havin’ NONE of it.
2) Roger Goodell, going full dad
It hasn’t always been smooth sailing for Roger Goodell as commissioner of the NFL. Over the years, he’s been criticized for many things, such as caring little for player safety and only considering owners’ hefty profits. More relevant to the 2020 draft coverage, many people are of the opinion that Goodell has the personality of a piece of burnt toast or a glass of milk.
There was a lot of Goodell throughout the draft. He bore the responsibility for announcing each pick, and as such he had quite a lot of screen time. A tradition of the draft each year is Goodell getting relentlessly booed by the fans who attend. This year, the broadcast had a virtual screen of fans “booing” Goodell as he read the picks off from his home. His planning team clearly told him to lean right into this…because that was Goodell’s go-to move all night.
There was a lot of this. Way too much of it, in fact. Vary it up, Roger! Show some pizzazz out there!
3) The poor Chargers and their lack of fans
Speaking of those virtual fans who called in to boo Goodell…..the Chargers really couldn’t find 12 of em?
It’s become all too easy to pick on the Chargers for their dearth of fans in recent years. The team relocated from San Diego to LA with little fanfare a couple years back. In LA, they’ve been playing their games in a soccer stadium with a 27,000 seat capacity - less than half of most NFL stadiums. Even with this set-up, the Chargers have had a hard time filling the seats with fans of their team.
This…..isn’t going to help things.
4) GET the hell away from my son
5) Could someone have taught Mike McCarthy how to set up the in-house cameras?
Zoom out, Mikey! Show us the home office! Let the scene breathe, big guy!
6) The entertaining variety of head coach at-home setups
Each NFL head coach phoned in remotely, and the range of arrangements displayed provided plenty of entertainment.
You had Bengals head coach Zac Taylor, making the first pick of the draft, looking like he was taking the call from a conference room at the local Ramada Inn. You had Mike Zimmer showing that he loves the outdoors. You had the most handsome coach in the game with the most handsome pad in the game. You had Bill Belichick not giving a damn.
7) I could write a 3,000 word essay on this photo
There is too much to dissect. Joe Exotic Mini-Me on the right. The semi-Blue Man suit on the left. Is there a dude taking a dump with the window open in the back right? You betcha there is. Poor girl on the far left who has to live with these crazies!!
8) Let’s end with a truly awesome sports moment
The video above was taken during the Seattle Seahawks last pick of the draft. The dude who got picked easily could have been passed up by every team. Instead, he ends up with a job. Sports can be pure and great sometimes. This draft was relatively pure, and it was definitely great.
Are Sports Back? (cont’d)
Still no, but ESPN’s The Last Dance documentary is providing sports fans everywhere with plenty of fodder for the proverbial water cooler.
The Last Dance has been an absolute delight from the moment it arrived (a couple months early, as ESPN read the room and brought the fans the content that they so badly needed). By releasing two parts of its 10-part series a week over five weeks, ESPN is recreating the Sunday night appointment viewing magic that Game of Thrones so successfully nailed before it.
Here are some of my favorite revelations/moments from the doc thus far:
1) The Scottie Pippen college tape
This man Scottie Drippin’ in swag enrolled at the University of Central Arkansas and started as the equipment manager before making the team!! He then became one of the best players in school history before moving on to the NBA. It didn’t hurt that while enrolled in school, he had a massive growth spurt and went from 6’1” to 6’8”. The college footage of Scottie dominating the competition is incredible.
2) Dennis Rodman straight up dipping to Vegas in the middle of the Bulls’ 97-98 season in which they were two-time defending champions lol
You wild for this one, Dennis. Can you imagine the reaction if anybody tried to do this now???
3) A Carmen Electra sighting!! Remember her?
Where in the world was Carmen Electra? Why, in Vegas with Dennis Rodman of course!
4) Phil Jackson looking handsome and dapper and zen AF
My funny friend and talented writer for The Atlantic Ashley Fetters said it as well as I can, but man was Phil Jackson a snack back in the day. This dude won titles for the New York Knicks (yes, THOSE New York Knicks) and then peaced out to coach budding ballers in Puerto Rico. He then ended up in the best basketball situation possible coaching-wise in Chicago. And he did it all while inventing Fixie-bike Hipsterism?? Phil Jackson, take a bow!
5) The GOAT’s hat game
Look at the greatest basketball player of all time making a beret look swaggy like it ain’t no thang. It’s as good a time as ever for berets to make a comeback.
6) A NEW MICHAEL JORDAN MEME!! HOORAY!!
Are Sports Back? (Pt. 3)
You know what, you’re goddamn right sports are back. They’ve been back since The Challenge: Total Madness debuted on April 1st.
CT. Johnny Bananas. Wes. Tori. Jordan.
Legendary athletes.
Get with the program if you haven’t already - you’re only five bingeable episodes behind!
A Community Shout-Out Before I Go
During these stressful times, many of us have to make an active effort to seek out content that serves as an escape from the uncertainty of the moment. Some common themes of such material? It’s light. It’s fun. It doesn’t take itself too seriously. And ideally, it brings a smile to viewers’ faces.
My good bud Jay and his wife Jen knock all of this out of the park and then some. Over the last week, they’ve started a “Daily Dumb Dance Break” series - each day, they choreograph a “dumb” dance to a new song. They’re typically short, upbeat, and a little corny. In short, they’re the perfect daily break from news, work, and pushup competitions.
Jay and Jen have a knack for dancing to great fanfare. In fact, this dance at their wedding went “semi-viral” (Jay’s words) when Montell Jordan got wind of it and posted it to the gram. I’m no Montell Jordan, guys, but I love your work! Keep it up.
Follow Jay and/or Jen for your dose of daily dumb dance content.
Three Songs from your Pal
Does anybody listen to these? Am I shouting into the feared void? Let’s get to some song recs.
1) Headie One - SOLDIERS feat. Sampha
Do you know what “drill rap” is? Neither did I, until I looked into the rapper behind this track. Headie One’s newest mixtape features collabs with Jamie xx, FKA twigs, and the always soulful Sampha.
2) Lido Pimienta - Te Queria
Get your fix of español today with this jam from Colombian singer Lido Pimienta. Pimienta was apparently creatively inspired by the reaction to Steve Harvey’s infamous Miss World competition gaffe a few years ago. If blunders like that can lead to music like her new album, I’m all for it.
3) Lous and The Yakuza - Dilemme
You won’t understand a word of this, but it’s the French hip hop banger you need today. Just trust me.
Happy Thursday everyone! Love and blessings to all.
Joey